An introvert living in an Extroverted world

Have you ever had an experience where you were invited by a friend on a long weekend at their vacation home, and the first thought that came to your mind is will I be able to escape for some "alone" time during the weekend.  Or have you declined an invitation to go out for dinner, after a long week at work, because you need some down time.  If you have had these experiences or similar ones, you are probably an introvert.  Now before you start to condemn yourself and assume you have some personality flaw, you need to understand being an introvert is not a bad thing.


I recently read an article by Simone Smith, entitled What it means to be an Introvert, in the article he dispels many preconceived notions about introverts.  He gives a great analogy, he relates how being an introvert is like playing a sport for an extended period of time.  An example would be running, you may be good at it and enjoy the time you spend doing it.  After an hour you may feel energized, after two hours you may start to feel some fatigue and after three hours your muscles are so fatigued that it is hard to put one foot in front of another.  That is exactly how an introvert would feel during social activities.  They may be having a great time in the beginning, enjoying themselves and really being engaged,  but after a couple of hours they need to recharge their battery.  As being around other people takes a lot of energy out of them.


Why is it so hard for introverts to be around others for an extended period of time?  The reason is that an introverts' energy source is within themselves and they tend to recharge their batteries by being alone. Conversely, introverts lose energy when they spend extend time amongst others. Some great attributes of  introverts are that they are vigilant listeners, thinking before they act, speaking slowly, and maintaining a smaller (but very close) circle of friends.



Further more introverts can be grouped into two types, there are those that are confident, self-sufficient, and hardworking and the other type that have trouble communicating, are rather shy in nature, and wish to be left alone. The latter type has been the introverted stereotype, however the former type is just as prominent.  They are often misconceived as extroverts  but they need just as much "alone time" to recharge as the former.

There are some benefits and disadvantages of being an introvert.  On the positive side they tend to be  known for having better attention spans and focus, making them more effective at staying on task when working on involved projects. The disadvantages of being an introvert, especially if they are the stereotypical introvert, is that they may be thought by others as being shy, they may seem aloof and disinterested in others.

Many of the disadvantages of being an introvert can be overcome, once people get to know them and understands their personality, others will be less likely to take things personally.  Conversely  these issues can make networking and socializing with strangers very difficult.

Living in an extroverted world can be frustrating at times, but if you have the right tools it can be less exasperating, first thing is that you need to understand how introversion works.  By knowing that social activities draw energy out of you, you can understand why you start to crash after a person-filled activity.  Also, try to explain to extroverts why you sometimes need some "alone" time.  Sometimes, introverts inadvertently hurt others' feelings, because they do not explain that their self quarantine from others at times is derived form internal exhaustion, not due to dislike or disgust of others.  By explaining to others that you are an introvert, and what exactly an introvert means, you will not only improve your own relationships, but also help the extroverts relationships with other introverts.