How to Deal With Criticism

How do you deal with criticism? The first reaction for me has always been to to defend myself, or if I am feeling particularly vulnerable I may lash back. And yet, while criticism can be taken as hurtful and/or demoralizing.   It can also be viewed in a positive way, it is honesty, and it can spur you to do better.   Here are some steps to deal with criticism and critical comments:


Steps 1

Postpone your first reaction. If your first reaction is to lash back at the person giving the criticism, or to become defensive, take a minute before reacting at all. Take a deep breath, and give it a little thought.


Step 2

This step goes hand in hand with step one, cool off.  You have to absorb and convert some heat to positive energy. That cooling off time allows you to give it a little more thought beyond your initial reaction. It allows logic to step in, past the emotion.   Sometimes when we let our emotions lead our reaction it can cause more harm than good. So let your emotions run their course.


Step 3

Turn a negative into a positive. One of the keys to success in anything you do is the ability to find the positive in things that most people see as a negative. Sickness forces you to stop your exercise program? That’s a welcome rest. You can do the same thing with criticism: find the positive in it. Sure, it may be rude and mean, but in most criticism, you can find a nugget of gold: honest feedback and a suggestion for improvement.


Step 4

See it as an opportunity to improve, and without improvement, we become stagnant. Improvement is a good thing. For example, this criticism: “You write about the same things over and over and your blog posts are boring and stale", can be read: “I need to increase the variety of my posts and find new ways of looking at old things.” Sometimes it’s just someone having a bad day, but many times there’s at least a grain of truth in the criticism.


Step 5

Thank the critic. Even if someone is harsh and rude, thank them. They might have been having a bad day, or maybe they’re just a negative person in general. But even so, your attitude of gratitude will probably catch them off-guard. Thanking a critic can actually win a few of them over.




I hope these few steps will help you the next time you are faced with criticism or a critical individual.   Thanks for reading.